I want to let out what I've been holding in for a long time. I'm a sensible wife, quiet at home, and I do everything I can to maintain peace and order in the family. But now, I don't know if it's right for me to remain silent anymore.
I'm Elva. A simple housewife. My husband and I had a good marriage, and we didn't have any major problems. Until one day, he said he would move in with his brother, who was just a college student. He was the one who was teaching here, so in support of his decision, I agreed.
My brother-in-law is from the provinces. He used to live with his parents. So when he went out to study, my wife and I chose us as his temporary home. At first, it was okay with me. I treated him like a brother. I cooked for him, did his laundry, and tried to be a good sister to him.
But as time went on, my attitude towards him gradually changed. It wasn't because I was the one who changed, but because I noticed something rude about him. When my husband was away, he would suddenly enter our bedroom without knocking. And he often did this when I had just taken a shower and was getting dressed. At first, I thought it was just a coincidence. But when it happened repeatedly, I started to get nervous and confused. I felt like he was doing it on purpose.
I didn't want to report it right away, but I reached a point where I couldn't take it anymore. So I told my husband everything. But his answer to me was, “Just be patient for now. Maybe he doesn't have any bad intentions.”
It hurts. Because I was the one who was insulted, I had to hold back. It seems like his sister is more important to him than how I feel as his wife. I accepted his decision to help his sister, but I didn't expect it to come to the point I'm the one who has to endure it in my own house.
A few months have passed, but there has been no change. His rude behavior is still there. When he feels that I am being left out, he seems to get even more annoyed. He is not ashamed. And the worst thing is, he has no respect for me as his brother's wife.
So now, I'm asking myself: How long should I endure? Is it still right for him to stay with us at home? He's not a child anymore. He's old enough to live in a dormitory. If my husband really wants him to study, maybe he can do it without us living under the same roof.
I don't know how to make my husband feel the gravity of the situation more clearly. I love my husband, but I hope he understands that I am his life partner — and I am the first person he should protect.
Home is a place of respect and peace. But what if right inside the house, I feel unsafe? What if every day I fear that my brother-in-law might suddenly open the door while I'm just wearing a scarf?
I didn't choose this. I just did my part as a wife and family member. But if the price of this is my dignity, I don't know if it's right to let it go.
Hopefully, my husband will see my importance — not just as a stay-at-home mom, but also as someone who should be respected, valued, and listened to.
