I'm Gilda, 28 years old, and my husband and I have been married for just one year. Honestly, I never imagined married life would be like this—especially when you marry a certified spoiled unico hijo.
Now, I'm pregnant with our first child. I thought he would be more responsible when a new family member arrives. But it seems like he's just become more complacent. He leaves the house every day, taking the car, but not to look for a job or even help with their business. He just goes straight to his friends. Sometimes, he'll come home late at night, smelling of alcohol and partying.
At first, I tried to understand. Maybe he was still adjusting to being a wife. Maybe he was stressed out by the changes. But as time went on, I noticed that I was the only one he was stressing out about.
I sometimes envy other pregnant wives, those who have a partner to take care of their needs, a partner to help save for the future. Me? What I have is a man who is all wanderlust and full of stories but no direction.
It's not that he doesn't have money. In fact, his family is rich. The condo we live in? His parents answered. The car he uses? They also gave it to him. Even our expenses, every month, his father answered. Maybe that's why he's so complacent—he knows he won't run out.
One day, I couldn't help it anymore. I talked to his parents. I said, I hope he will at least be taught responsibility. But instead of agreeing, I was the one who got scolded. “Why are you forcing our son to work? Isn't that why we support you so you won't understand anything like that?”
I was surprised. It was as if it was my fault that I wanted my husband to learn to sew. His father said that he was a business partner in their company and that the money we used came from his shares. But if that's the case, why didn't he even have time to go to the office? Not once did I see him open his laptop or face the supplier.
It's scary to think that one day, all of this will be for naught. What if the business fails? What if the wind changes and we have nothing to look forward to? In this situation, what does my husband know about work, about managing money, about running his own life?
So now, I'm thinking that maybe this is the right time for me to talk to him calmly. Not to scold, but to explain that we need to be prepared. It's not like someone will help us forever.
Maybe I can encourage him to start a small business. It doesn't have to be big right away. Even a franchise of a convenient store or a small cafe. Whatever will give him a reason to learn to face responsibility.
I don't want him to think that I don't know how to be grateful for all the blessings that come from his family. But I also want to make him feel that having his own abilities is important. I love my wife, but I also love our upcoming child, and I want to make sure that at least, we have a future that isn't dependent on other people.
Sometimes, it's really hard. But maybe, with the right request and the right timing, he'll understand why it's important. Until then, I'm hoping.
