My life has not been easy since childhood. I am 27 years old, with three children — nine, six, and three years old. I grew up without parents by my side. The only people I had were my grandparents, who acted as my parents. But even so, it hasn't been easy. My relatives often shunned and distanced themselves from me because they said I was the "favorite." They didn't know the truth — that behind their seeming special, I had wounds and sorrows that I endured alone.
I never met my father. My mother left to work as a maid when I was only three months old. When she took me to join her new family, I did everything I could to adjust. But not long after, I had to leave because my stepfather abused me. I felt so much pain and fear at the time. I moved back in with my grandparents, and continued my education even though it was difficult. In college, I met the man who would become my husband. But because of my haste and lack of planning, I didn't finish my studies.
At first, our life was going well. My husband had a job because of his father's business. But when their family broke up, everything changed. He lost his good job. We had serious financial problems. It even reached the point that due to the hardships of life, my husband made a mistake that led to him being imprisoned. At that time, I felt like my world was collapsing. I didn't know how I would get back up, but I chose to stay by his side.
Many people tell me to divorce him. But how can I do that if I have nothing to leave behind for my children? I can't even trust them with my mother because I'm afraid they'll go through what I went through with my stepfather. So even though it's hard, I've managed. When his mother helps out, I take my children to visit their father.
I admit, it's also our fault why we're in this situation. We were in a hurry, we didn't have a proper plan for life. But I don't want our family to be completely broken. I don't want my children to experience growing up without a father, like I went through. I don't want us to be a "broken family" because I know how painful and difficult that is. Even though I'm tired, even though many tears have fallen, I still choose to fight for my family.
This is my life now — full of fear, anxiety, and hope. I don't know when everything will change, but I hope that the day will come when I will see my husband smile again, and I will feel peace in our home. As long as I can, I will choose to stay, for my children and for the dream family that is still intact despite everything.
